My binary palette

Have you ever wondered what the gray shades are all about? I keep hearing about them, in relative terms; about people the world just cannot seem to classify in either...I don't know...good or bad (this is the only human tendency I seem to possess) or some similar delusional sets. If there really were those in-between people, they would probably be the residue of an indecent, explosive, rendezvous between the angel and the devil!!

If a person stabs me in the back, I wont go 'Et tu Brutus!', but would have a more humane reaction like 'what the f***!!'. Who'd waste time analyzing the situation, the working of the devious brain and contemplating about second chances. Come on, in this busy busy world that we living in today, we barely have time for ourselves let alone trying to figure out which one of those "friends" you had over last night is bitching about you in the back! I can still be cool with gossiping (its just something we had engrained in us a very long time back prolly dating back to the Big Bang....how else would that theory have survived till now!). But having double standards within your group of friends never is. My roomie says though that you can't judge a person, based on one reaction. Heck why not?? Isn't that when they show you their true colors. Throw them in a no-win situation and watch if they slime there way out of it or put up a good fight. It doesn't even need to be something complicated, just little things that show what they really are made of.  Being able to call up your buddy to drop you off at the grocery store or to pick you up when your car breaks down or when you did a bad hair coloring job at 1 in the night (totally, hypothetical situation!) or when you are in the middle of a fight with that obnoxious jerk. You can't turn to random people for help, as it's embarrassing just to ask. When all else falls apart who does one turn to if not their friends? And how would we feel if they weren't there to pick up the scattered pieces of your misery (quite a utopian expectation). 

Every person is a binary coded signal. All 0's and 1's, they can be fluctuating between either but they are never in the half zone. But every one just gets one chance in life to take the extra shot, to prove to someone that they do care if you being dragged around like a dirty alley cat (ok, my references are getting weirder by the word). Sometimes it may not seem important going that extra length, making that extra effort but for someone on the other side would think the world of you when you do. Friendships do not just last forever, you have to make them last with your own effort and perspective. Over time you'd be a happy soul with your choices.

Wouldn't it be great if we had inbuilt radar receptors, to warn us before hand about whose going to be an arse, or whose going to make sure you get home alright after an especially drunk night; without actually having to go through the ordeal of getting to know a person. I for one would wait for those to come out on sale though, as I'd rather enjoy the show.

my first time

Of all the titles possible, the one I choose to begin my glorifying journey (is it a journey if its through cyberspace???) in the quest for the Greater Good (umm actually I just have nothing better to do!) is "My First Time". At the risk of sounding like a tease, I begin a rather dull introduction.

There have been so many first-times in our lives that I for one have started to loose track. The first time I blew my nose onto a newspaper that was handy (tip: not a very good idea), the first time I stalked an elusive crush (FYI those charges were dropped after I bribed him with a fruit and butt nut). The first time I read 'Love Story ', or the first time I tricked my lil sis into believing she was adopted. Aah, the pleasures of being a complete whacko. I stare into (cyber)space today and wonder when was it that we stopped enjoying these tiny emotions.

The first time I was at an international airport I was thrilled beyond my senses! I could not pull myself away from the endless counters at duty free. London-always wanted to visit that city, but had to make do with wandering terminal 4 at the Heathrow Airport (for 5 hours!!). Had my nose pressed against the Boots store, unable to go in (it cost me $4.75 just for water!!!) nor walk away. Burberry perfumes, Hermes bags, Harrods.....sighhhh...... My friend had to literally drag me away from the airport lounge when our flight was announced the second time.
The first time I smelt the earth wet after the rains, I knew there was a reason to live!
The first time I lost faith in a friend...though I was sloshed out of my mind to remember what happened, I do know that it felt like a physical blow. It sucks to loose a friend, and shattering to loose the best kind.
The first time I realized I was living all by myself, I was stumped. It actually hit me when I was doing my groceries. My roomie and I got into this debate over which was the best toilet paper. I realized, Shit! I am taking care of myself. Along with an exhilerating sense of liberation, I felt alone in a crowd.
The first time I had chai with my roommates at 2 in the night, we rambled on till the first rays of sunlight hit our windows. I realized that the best things in life come in small packages.
The first time I wrote a blog, I just wanted to keep going.....